Heels Up!

I shouldn't have been laughing, but I just could not help it!

Jake and I were driving along, just minding our own business. I was driving home from the gym, feeling accomplished about working out. Even though many people work out many days of the week, each time I actually make it, I am surprised and proud. It's just so easy to blow it off. Anyway, we were tooling along . . .

Stow and Go seating - what a great thing. I used to have to bring a neighbor over to move seats around in my car. Or . . I had to schedule to have Chris put seats back in, or take them out. I used to promise to car pool and drive, only to have kids show up last minute for departure, and realize that my seats were all sitting in my garage. They were so heavy and bulky, I would be cursing under my breath the whole time I was arranging . . . Anyway, I love Stow and Go. It is worth the six year loan . . . ..

So the other day, I had the driver side seats all folded down. . . and little Jake was in the very back in a single seat. He loves sitting way back there in his own world. He was watching a movie on the back movie player . . . all was as it should be. Usually, we go to the gym and then run errands, typically to Costco, where we acquire many groceries and supplies. But this day, no errands. Just the gym. In fact, the van was pretty empty.

So when I stopped at a red light, and then accelerated when it turned green, I was very surprised to hear the 'Thud!' in the back. I thought to myself, "Humm, I didn't buy anything . . . I don't have anything loose to be rolling around . . . what could that be?"

All of a sudden, I heard a slow starting whine . . . "wwwwaaaaaaaaa, haaaaaaa, haaaaaa . ...."

I looked in the rear view mirror . . .. only to see Jake's Spider Man Boots sticking up toward the ceiling, like almost flat against the ceiling! What in the Hee Haw! His Stow and Go seat had come unlocked and had flipped him back, slamming his head against the back door. He had NO room to get out of this postition. I had to pull over, unbuckle him, so he was able to roll to the side and drop out of his trap. He was balling. I, realizing that he was really fine, was trying trying very hard not to laugh. Because it was not funny at all!

Of course, everyone I told, busted out laughing. IT'S NOT FUNNY!

Highway to Where????

So we were driving home from dropping off Girl Scout Cookie money after school. It had been a pajama day for Jacob and myself. Well, I was really in workout clothes because I did a whopping 18 minutes on the machine in the basement . . . I couldn't spell u-l-y-p-t-i-c-a-l correctly if I tried. And Jacob, he was in PJ pants, no shirt, no shoes, but at least a jacket on, because it's gotta be at least 30F outside . . . Anyway, I did not want to be going anywhere today b/c I was looking like I just rolled out of bed. So I was planning on sending Julia to the door, since it was her Girl Scout stuff anyway.

So we drop the money off and are working our way back home when Jake asks to play a game on my iphone. Sure, I said, because I was really tired of hearing "Lots and lots of trains . . . .going under tunnels and through the tracks . . . " soundtrack repeatedly. So I popped that video out and rock music started blasting through the speakers. Julia commented that she usually heard this song in Daddy's car. Of course, Chris programmed MY stations in MY van to HIS music. So I quickly switched it to my favorite Christian station. I asked the kids, knowing full well the answer, if Daddy ever played Christian music in his car. Julia said, hesitantly, "Yeah . . . " I interrupted "No he doesn't!" She grinned. I said, "Next time you're in his car, tell him you want to listen to Christian music." I'm of course thinking that this will increase his guilty conscience if the kids start asking for inspirational music.

Then Jacob blurted out "No! I like hearing . . .(then he began singing) High - way - to - Hell!" by AC/DC. Reminder, to all my readers, Jake is 4. Nice. Very spiritual. Of course, the good mother I am, I bust out laughing. We all did. In our parental defense, I think this song is on Iron Man or Guitar Hero, or something. It's not like we walk around singing that one!

About five minutes later, Julia confessed that she had said that Dad plays Christian music because she didn't want Daddy to get in trouble. "In trouble by who?" I asked. "By you," she said. Gosh, those little buggers are smart!!!! Never, never have I (out loud) chastised Chris for his lack of inspirational music. That Julia, she is certainly in tune. So Chris, just so you know, she was sticking up for you, Just In Case.

Then, sweet Julia said, "You know Mom, I kinda like that song too."

"I know Julia, me too." Then, with full awareness that these young impressionable minds are soaking in everything, I found the song on my sync system (Chris had already programmed it in for me!) We cranked it up, drove around the hood. But being the good mom that I am, I did insert 'heaven' instead of 'hell'

Toxic Release

I was having a "Deafeated Mom" day. You know the kind, those days where kids are arguing, and you don't even care. The dog is continually aiming to walk underneath your feet. One of the cats dragged pooh from the kitty litter onto the floor, which I thought was some burrs or leaves from the back yard stuck to the carpet, so I continued to walk over it until finally, I had enough time to pick it up and realized it was pooh . . . You know this day. Everyone seemed to have a high pitched whiney voice, the voice that actually is like finger nails on the chalk board, I just cringe as soon as they start talking. Anyway, Julia and Jacob were escalating in some kind of argument. If I had to hear "Mom!" "Mom!" MMMMOOOOOOMMMMMMM! one more time, I was going to change my name. So they were arguing, and I heard Julia saying "Stop it, Jacob! Stop it!" "Stop it, Jacob! Stop it!" Ok, times this by 10 . . . 10 more times . . . and 10 times the volume. I just stayed in the laundry room, folding clothes, because I had more use in here at the moment. I tried to justify this by thinking that I was a good mom, letting them work this out on their own. Isn't this how kids establish leadership and surrender in life? The relationships with their siblings? So I just tried to hold my breath and close my ears until it was over. I considered putting my headphones in . . . something I am ashamed to admit that I do during PMS weeks. But then, all of a sudden, Julia let out a TOXIC scream! I think she screamed, "STOP IT!!!!!!!!!" but I don't really know, because the shrill rattled my eardrums. However, following the scream, I immediately felt a release . . . a relief . . . I remembered one of my besites, Kim, telling me (after I had just screamed at my kids) that screaming helps you release toxins. I love that spin on it . . . I actually was a good mom in that moment for letting Julia wail it out! And of course, Jacob was unphased . . . in fact, when I did go in to peek at the scene, he had a grin on his face. Wouldn't you know. Good for you Julia, Toxic Release.