My date with two Boys

Today, I CHOSE to bring my son Jacob and his best buddy, Brooks, (both 4)
to the mall. Now, those of you who really know me are wondering why I would punish myself like that! My answer to that is "because it is Wild Wednesday at Jeepers!" All day riding for only $5 per kid.

The best part? Moms ride for free!!!!

So today was my first whirl on the bumper cars. I'm wondering, do other moms feel when they get on bumper cars like they want to DESTROY the other cars? I'm thinking that either I've had too much caffiene today, OR I have some pent up aggression. I was always competitive, but competing against 4-yr-olds doesn't seem like it should be that exciting.

Next stop? The massive play structure. My son would not go to the highest level
with me, you know, the one with the twisty slide that gives you static electricity that is actually painful. Luckily, Brooks would go there with me so I didn't look like a total idiot.

Then, while I was chatting with a distraught friend on the phone (while of course keeping my eyes on two active boys in the play land)-quick prayer of thanks that Women really can multiple-task! I had to interrupt my friend to correct another mother. That's right. See, she had been disciplining her toddler son from 'beating' on the cushy banana while my boys laid motionless on the banana. She was reprimanding him, so I intervened to fill her in that they were playing
Dead Lion. Her son was playing the role of lion whisperer and trying to wake the lions! When I got back on the phone, my friend was cracking up about how we, as moms, go from a serious heart conversation, to handling a dead lion issue, and back to serious-all in one breath!

Anyway, I won't bore you with the details of the other rides and activities, but I will say that this was one of the better days I've had lately.

Who would've thought!

Now I want a Pony!

I've been accused of having too many pets. In fact, I'm worried because there is a new show on TV about Pet Hoarding. At the end of the show, there is a statement posted that says that if you know someone who has more pets than they can take care of, please call 1800-555-whatever.

I'm actually concerned that someday, these people will show up at my door with cameras. Oh, I just thought of a plan! I'll send them to Tenessee where my birth mom, Beverly lives. She collects dogs and is worse than me (I think.) Anyway, I do come by it naturally. Plus, I blame all these pets on my daughter, Jordan. She's an animal freak and I have had difficulty in the past saying 'no' to her.

I'm way off the point. Last night was Octoberfest in Downtown Rochester. I had worked all day, seeing clients with real problems, and actually felt depressed by the end of the day. But we had plans to go out with our friends to Octoberfest, which should be named "Survive in a big sweaty tent with tons of people, and pay loads of cash for rubbery hot dogs, good beer, and cheap wine." Oh, and enjoy the German dancers who look like they are having NO fun! Again, I'm off the point.

The best part of the evening was being outside at the kids activities, where we also spent tons of 'tickets'. My little Jacob was going through the big kids bounce house obstacle course like any other big kid out there! As I watched, I had tears in my eyes: I was shouting to people on the inside to help him out, (there were tall climbing challenges) but Jacob was refusing HELP. Wonder where he gets that! My middle child - of course I haven't mentioned her because she is my middle child - she was walking around picking grass to feed the goats because I refused to pay $1 for feed. And my oldest, Jordan, was stuck like glue to the animals she could pet. Again, the goats. She also wanted to play games, but by the time we were there, the prizes were gone. The adults were trying to blow the rest of the tickes so we could go home to bed . . . so we were pushing the pony rides, a big ticket blower. Well, Jordan, my animal lover, is also nervous to do new things. She was reluctant to get on the pony (or the dance floor for that matter) even though her best friend was physically dragging her by the arm. I decided, "Why try to make her do it, I'll just ride the pony!" I began to beg her for the tickets . . . .she didn't like that idea either. But finally, after realizing there were no other options, she gave in and handed me the tickets.

Long story way too long, in the end, she got on the pony, and I was right beside her. And then, the pony guy could see the joy in my eyes, and he let me hop on a pony too! A freshly bathed in WISK detergent pony! So cute and soft and fluffy! Who is the child here?

I want a pony!

Go Figure

So, my husband is out tonight with friends. Which is actually something we do really well together, I mean, support each other to go out with friends and have time away from family. The problem is that we usually don't go out together! Anyway, that will be another post.

Tonight, of all nights, I get this bug to make home-made Chinese food. This is only strange because I don't recall EVER making Chinese. In fact, the only time my family eats Chinese is when I go out of town!

Once, when I was preparing to leave town for work, I asked my oldest daughter, Jordan, if she liked it when I leave town. She said, "Yes, because we get Chinese food and doughnuts. But when it comes time for you to go, I never want you to leave." Its horrible that food is such a drug!

Anyway, today, I received my shipment of Wildtree - which - if you don't know, is all natural food products that are AWESOME! In my attempt to be a better wife (which backfired this evening) I ordered some Thai Sesame Sun Butter Sauce and some Kickin' Asian Stir-Fry Sauce. All natural, blah blah blah. (I'm a health addict, for those of you who don't know me.) (Side bar, just because I'm a health addict doesn't mean I'm healthy or totally skinny and in shape, by the way. It just means I always try to feel better by focusing on being healthy.)

Oh My Goodness! All I can say is that the dinner I made was so tasty, I literally walked out my front door and over to my neighbors house to see if they wanted to eat over! I had made so much of this awesome food, and my main Chinese Eater was out with his buds. Well, the neighbors were on their way out to eat, but the wife/mom did come over to sample it. And she did agree that it ROCKED!

So naturally, my children, who eat real Chinese every time I go away, well, they really didn't like it at all. And my hubby wasn't home to eat it. So I reveled in it myself!

The lesson? Once again, I'm not sure if there is one. And now I have to go because my kids are asking for snacks (b/c they are starving from their taking only three bites of dinner). Surely my husband is about to walk in the door asking for dinner - anything but Chinese!

So What If I'm Weird!

So, in my quest for better health, which, by the way, is an on-again-off-again love affair for me, I just went for a run. If you can call it that . . . .because I took my unruly dog with me, along with my 4-yr-old son. Of course my son, Jacob, was riding his bike. But his bike had a flat tire. Why not just fill the tire? Yeah. I did. But within moments, apparently it was losing air. It would be no biggie, except that the weak tire causes Jacob to have difficulty starting because the back tire spins out. My first thought was, I'll push to get him started, and then he can just keep going. Wrong again. Try getting a 4-yr-old to keep going. Not possible because there are weeds to check out, paths that need to be taken, and hills that need to be climbed. I thought we lived in a flat neighborhood with no hills. That was, until I tried to get the 4-yr-old boy to ride along with a flat tire. That's when I realized the whole neighborhood is one subtle hill!

So between stopping and starting, and attempting to keep space between me and the dog, and the dog and the boy who was all over the road, I think I probably got a 12 minute semi-jog in today. Just in time for a Friday evening glass of wine!

The lesson? Not sure there is one here, except to think twice before I try to go for a simple run. Because when you are a mom, not many things are simple. And certainly when they are, it's only because it is an unexpected bonus, not because you had any control at all!

One more thing, as I was running, (ok, doing my circus act around the neighborhool) a few boys were playing in a wooded area. As we ran by, they popped out of the bushed and yelled, "Hey! You're weird!" Although I am usually a non-confrontive, peaceful, forgive & forget, it's all good type of person (at least "I" see myself that way!) something came over me. Maybe it was a much needed hormonal surge . . . anyway, I turned around . . . I continued to jog in place, not sure why, it's not like my heart rate was really up . . . and I yelled "Excuse me?" The boys yelled "You're weird!" I said, "What did you say?" They yelled again, "You're weird!" I'm sure they were thinking that I had a major hearing problem by this point. So I took a deep breath, preparing to talk about how name calling is inappropriate, but they ducked back into the bushes. I guess it was their way of saying "Talk to the Bush!." So I turned to resume my vigorous exercise. Then, I heard a door close, and saw a man walking out of his garage at the house near the woods. He was on the phone, but I was on a mission to tell somebody that name calling is inappropriate! I gave him the hand signal for "are you on the phone?" You know, the finger in the ear and thumb to mouth, as I jogged in place to keep the heart rate activated. He nodded yes, but said, "What's up?" He had to be wondering who the heck I was and why was I speaking in sign language to him as I hopped up and down from one foot to another. I said "Are those your boys over there?" He said, non-committally, "Probably. Why?" I reported "They called us weirdo's as we went by." Now, at this moment, I felt like the nerdy tattle-tale kid who can't take care of herself. Ugh, how do I get out of this looking like an adult?!? I wasn't quite prepared for what happened next . . . he yelled over to the boys, "Hey, these people aren't weird, they are nice people!" He chuckled like a jokester, seemingly totally not concerned with his kids behavior. Now, I was speachless, and trust me, that doesn't happen often! So I shrugged my shoulders, said "just thought you'd want to know", felt like a loser tattler, and turned my jog back in the direction of Jacob. One last chance to make my point: I said, "Jake, name calling is inappropriate. That wasn't nice of them, was it." He said, "No mom, come on, let's go!"

All was not lost. Lesson? I had forgotten what our children go through, more-so, how it feels for them to be called names, etc. When my kids tell me that someone teased them, I do always try to listen and validate their feelings. But half the time, I'm also making dinner, folding clothes, or doing whatever. Next time they are picked on by someone, and they come to tell me their story, I will pay closer attention and remember what it's like to be called a weirdo - repeatedly.

Distracting Myself

There are at least a million other things I should be doing right now, starting with preparing for curriculum night, which begins in less than one hour. Not only do I have to ditch the yoga pants and look presentable, I have to man . . . I mean 'woman' a table for recruiting volunteers for Girl Scouting. Do you think I have all that stuff together? Like any good fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants personality, I have done nothing to get ready. But I will show up!

I just figured that my life is so important, millions of people simply need to hear what I have to say. The time to start a blog is NOW! So, more on that later, since my daughter is begging me for help with a project that is due in, yeah, less than one hour!